The Complaint Department

If you have little ones, you should be familiar with the time of day that gets referred to as The Witching Hour.  Wikipedia defines it like this:

In occult belief, the term witching hour refers to the time of night at which creatures such as witches, demons, and ghosts are thought to appear and to be at their most powerful, and at which black magic is thought to be at its most effective. This is because the period from 3AM to 4 AM is the span where there are no Catholic church services and prayers which are marked by the Canonical hours which are also three regular hours in length.

In mama/caregiver lives it’s that time of the afternoon between preparing to eat dinner and bedtime, and ish get crazy then!

Those ghouls and that black magic are flying all over my house during then EVERY. DAY. Other than allowing unending episodes of Justin Time to be watched on Netflix or giving in to letting them play, fully clothed, in the water hose, I can’t come up with any better ways to handle my pack from 4 to 7pm.

I deal with tattling throughout the day, but during WH (that’s what we’ll call the witching hour from now on, k?), I turn into the official Ferrell Complaint Department.

Hank wants to complain about a certain child at daycare.  He gives me a run down of everything that that child did that day that annoyed him.  He reenacts scenes from swimming lessons when the child got in trouble for [insert asinine reason] and tells me how he would have handled it had he been in charge.  Every now and again, he switches it up and complains that Margaret Hannah is looking at him.

Margaret Hannah brings things to the department’s attention like “You are exactly wrong about why that man is getting arrested on COPS, mom!  You exactly said it was because he was running from the police, but I know the right things, and it was because he swallowed a ziploc bag.”

3 things to address with that:  She’s just learned the word exactly, her awareness of her surroundings is frightening when she repeats this stuff in public, and I’m thankful she used the term ziploc bag as opposed to crack rock.

I don’t even know what channel COPS comes on any more.  She slips off to her bedroom to “make a list” with the lone orange crayon that survived the wall-coloring purge from a few weeks ago, and somehow, makes her way to our room to hang out with the Men and Women of Law Enforcement…

I can’t even.

Amos usually only complains when someone sits in his spot on the couch.  It’s never the same spot, just the one he thinks is his at that time.  Or about why I won’t let him eat a third box of yogurt covered raisins.  He does like to complain about that.

Porter is my anchor, though.  That sweet boy just coos and watches it all, unless he’s working up a poop.  Then he might complain.

So, here’s where I’m going with all this, I need to complain about a few things today. You be my Complaint Department for a few minutes, please?  I’ll even put it in list form to make it easier to keep up with, because we know how I feel about a list…

  1.  Sorting children’s clothes

    There’s SO MUCH.  They outgrow things too fast, I’m too sentimental, and it seems to multiply when I take it out of all my hiding spots.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m oh-so-thankful to be able to go through these things.  To have these children in my life, but there are just SO MANY THINGS in my living room right now.

2.  My husband working late20160629_222010.jpg

He hasn’t been home before 2 AM since last week.  I’m not happy about it.  He’s got this weird thing about not getting into a hot bed, so in his absence, I’ve let the kids sleep with me most nights because A. When I’m let alone with 4 children for this many hours a day, I don’t care about a hot bed, B. Family Co-sleeping is a big thing in Europe.  I’m embracing it, and C. I CANNOT be softly touched on the cheek by a 3 year old ONE MORE TIME at 1:56 AM or be scared awake by a 5 year old staring at me at midnight without accidentally punching them.  So, family bed it is for now.

3.  That dang mail lady20160630_113411.jpgI ordered this cover 2 weeks ago.  It was guaranteed 3-5 business days to get here.  That meant I should have had it around last Thursday.  I’ve tracked it every morning.  I know how long it spent in Texas and Georgia.  I also know it spent 4 days “awaiting pickup” in my town. I can’t roll my eyes any harder.  Whatever, I’ve got it now, and can’t wait to use it.  I you’re interested in checking them out, look up Milk Snob on Instagram.  Good Stuff.

Since I’m the house Complaint Department, I want to know 3 complaints you’ve got.  No judgement in this space!  Everybody needs to whine about something every now and again.  I’ll just read these during the WH today, so I feel even closer to you all.


6 thoughts on “The Complaint Department

  1. 1. My kids have decided that they are above helping around the house… which means Mom is above letting them have TV privileges or letting them go anywhere (p.s., punishing the kids is also a punishment for me in this case :/ )

    2. Laundry and dishes… they NEVER END!!!!

    3. The one-year-old is going through a screaming stage, about every perceived wrong that she encounters


  2. 1. CLEANING THE HOUSE!!! But I also LOVE a clean house. But it is a vicious cycle. I clean it…everyone else messes it up, and their version of helping me clean is just putting it somewhere they think is appropriate which means I have to put it where it actually goes. FRUSTRATING!!! And NO…I will never be able to wave the white flag and let it go!!!
    2. When I have to wait for an hour an a doctor’s office for my child to get his 11 year old shots. It’s just shots people. Load the needle and proceed. But no, we sit and wait with two vehicles in the parking lot, only one on the sick side and ONLY us on the well side. We arrived 10 minutes early, but they wait for the waiting room to fill up, then call back about 5-6 at a time, fill all the rooms, then let the doc take turns in every room. Just call us back as soon as we get there, give us the “well” shots and let us break free. Common sense has gone out the window.
    3. One last RANT…when people post personal junk on FACEBOOK. You are LOOKING FOR ATTENTION!!!! And no, most of the time when someone sees, “prayer request…God knows” they are NOT GOING TO PRAY FOR YOU!! They are; however, going to pry and spy trying to find out what you need prayer for. Keep the posts to funny comments, random things, news we NEED to know or WANT to know, and PICTURES. Because we all love a good dose of pictures. But we do NOT like an abundance of selfies from someone who is much too grown to be self absorbed with his or her own self.


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